On Female Mentorship: The Girls Who Get It, Get It.
by sarah selip
Are you looking for a mentor? Find your people first.
Ladies, I’ve said it before, but sometimes it feels downright impossible to find a woman to take you under their mentorship wing in This Town.
I have a theory.
Some older women, especially in the political world, are genuinely threatened by the idea of a younger woman succeeding in their field. I’ve been through it myself.
Growing up in This Town professionally, I felt snubbed whenever I tried to grab coffee or lunch with older, established career women in politics. I was scarred from my experiences with my first boss, and it was already terrifying enough to speak up and reach out to them, asking for an hour of their time. I was young, traumatized, and felt utterly alone. So, among other things, I projected.
This Town is all about relationships — shamefully, it’s more important than anything; it helps you land jobs. That said, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life after my first job. That’s a weird time, which most people don’t discuss, the space after your first big girl job. It’s more than an internship. Add a sprinkle of ‘finding yourself’ and a dash of ‘what do I want to do with my life,’ but where do you go?
It sucks at the moment, but it’s only up from there.
Let’s take a second to reiterate this essential point. There’s a difference between being a “girl’s girl” and a girl wanting to help other girls.
I didn’t have it when I was younger, so I want to be that person for others. Enter my passion for female mentorship.
I’m a girl’s girl through and through.
I love my girlfriends in Washington more than anything. I trust them with my life. We work in the same industry, our bosses (and former bosses) are probably friends, and we’ve gone through similar trials and tribulations — especially regarding mentorship. We’ve all dealt with this to some extent — whether in comms, fundraising, or policy. I look up to them, even though we’re the same age. They challenge me to be better at what I do.
God’s truth. It’s hard for women to succeed when they feel alone.
Finding your tribe helps you build a network. Finding your network enables you to find mentors. Their mentors can adopt you.
When it comes to mentorship, you have to know where to look.
One of my go-to phrases (in general) is, “The girls who get it get it.” Women who want to support other women will help other women… in their careers, personal lives, and so on.
Lucky for me, my sister is a licensed life coach and my biggest fan. I don’t know what I’d do without her, and when I approached finding a mentor, I decided that I should feel similarly, where I can come to them without feeling like a burden or like I’m asking stupid questions.
I finally found strong, badass female mentors at twenty-eight. I recently realized that the female mentors I sought at 21 weren’t right for me. You shouldn’t have to beg for a seat at their table — the ladies who want to help young girls will be there with open arms, ears, and great advice.
Mentorship is a huge passion for me. The ability to be that person for others, especially other girls, brings me so much joy and purpose.
My golden rule regarding mentorship is to find your people first. It’s all about finding the perfect fit. I can’t stress this enough — when you find your people, the right mentor for you will follow suit.
The girls who get it, get it.
Beverly, Vanessa, Alyssa, AJ, Miranda, Reagan, Charlotte, Madeline, and my sister, Stacie. This one is for you.
